Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Weeks 1-3

In order to play catch up - I want to give a brief summary of my journey so far. My Journey started 4 weeks ago while having lunch with a long-time friend. She is very gifted in sports and training I decided to put down my defenses, and has for help. and she and i have been working out together, every morning, since.

The first week was tough because it was new and all of the presumptions about what my body could and couldn't do were being challenged and stretched. My mind didn't like it very much - and...well...I have a mental breakdown on my friend's living room floor. In my mind a battle raged between that which I had always known, and the unknown; the pain I had always felt and the possible of feeling no pain. On that day, the battle was lost - but it was a step toward winning the war.

Week 2 was a little better. It was all still new, but I was gaining confidence in what my body was actually capable of. I pushed the narrow limits which I had imposed on myself, and defied the odds. For the first time in my life, I went jogging, public. It was scary for me. I know that when I see a jogger, I always stare (a little). I just knew that there was someone in there car, starring at me, laughing at my attempt to jog with 'heft'. After about the first 5 minutes, I was then consumed by muscular burning, that those fears quickly changed to survival..."Courtney, one foot in front of the other. 1-2-3-4, 1-2-3-4." This was the only thing my brain could muster. But...after all was run and done, aside from the huffing, puffing and nausea - I felt so strong. In my 30-minute venture outside...I had jogged a total of 1 mile.

Week 3 was better still. There was a tangible difference in how my body was responding both in workouts and outside in the "real world". I was getting stronger and my body was slowly trimming down. Mental images of what I could look like and how i might feel in September - overtook my thoughts. Mean and nasty comments spoken to me over the years vanished with each drop of sweat.

In the beginning, God created the heavens and earth with a single phrase..."Let it be." In this beginning, God said to me "Come forth and Let it be"...Here I am, Lord.

Let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us, and let us throw off EVERYTHING that hinders.


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